I am just going to be honest: I have no idea what I am doing or what I am supposed to write. I’ve wanted to ‘start’ a blog since 2005 (I even have the wordpress account to prove it) but there are only two rambling, badly written, and whiny posts there. That is a lot of wasted time, a lot of…. nothing.
But what stops me? Myself, obviously. It’s not like I have a lot of life getting in the way: I am a recent college grad with a BA in English (minors in writing, philosophy and Art and Design). I am currently unemployed. Within the last month I broke up with my abusive boyfriend (hit, pushed, kicked, bit… you name it, he did it. And I’m not even going to get into the emotional manipulation and emotional assassinations). I stopped doing drugs (which I did with him. Everything from pot to crack and prescription pills and everything in between. Again, that is a whole other story), and I stopped drinking excessively (which I define as drinking every day in order to get black out drunk, even if I was alone).
SO, after all that I have a lot of free time on my hands. Why not start a blog now? But what do I blog about? I really had trouble with this question, and still do. I feel as if I am interested in too many subjects to pick just one and that I have no ‘expertise’ in anything enough to write about it. Still, I have to write and I have this undeniable urge to share my words with people…. I have to. It would not be an exaggeration to call this urge a compulsion.
Therefore, I have set forth a project for myself: I did not like the person I was in my recent past: selfish, excessive, blind, and rude. I want to be a better version of myself; I want to be the person I know I can be. To do this, I am going to go to some dark places in my own mind and have to own up to some of my most disgusting and shameful qualities. But such is the price of knowledge.
I have no structure for this self-excavation project yet. I guess I will figure that out as I go. Wish me luck!!
Congratulations on the good choices you’ve recently made. Took a lot of courage to step away from the things that were holding you back.
Writing a blog isn’t easy but it is rewarding. Anyone who can get through some of the courses you have taken in college can do it. Just commit to writing once a week and then follow through. What to write about? Think of a quote you like and blog about that. Or a song. Or a movie, or book, or poem. Maybe a character trait. I’ve subscribed to your blog and I hope to receive word of a new post soon. I wish you well!
Thank you so much for your support. I get discouraged so easily that sometimes I wonder what is the point of writing a blog anyway. But reading you comment gave me one of those “Ohhh YEAH” moments. I can write about anything and if I need inspiration, I can start from something simple: a quote or a question and just let it go on from there! Thank you so much! You’ve really helped keep me motivated and keep the weekly posts coming on a regular basis.
Well wishes to you on your journey to becoming a better you. Sometimes in the darkest corners of our minds lies that element which we need in order to become a better person. It is making sure that we have a torch to light our way and a map to get us back that is the trickiest part, as our minds can be a scary place to get lost in.
It is very true that the things in our darkest corners are often the thing that need to come out to the light. It is a pretty painful process, and very confusing. Thank you for your support. I truly need it and appreciate it!!